June 15, 2010

Bonnaroo: What I found when I was lost

I have spent the last 4 days amidst a hot mess, literally, also known as Bonnaroo. Though it was the longest 4 days of my life, (the portapotties alone were an issue not to mention the general heat index) it was like a resurrection for me. For 4 days, I battled the fiery sun and dehydration and returned alive and inspired. 

Before my trip to Manchester, TN... I have to admit, I felt a little lost- which is ironic considering I spent majority of my time wandering a field with landmarks such as "This Tent" "That Tent" and "The Other Tent". I watched the sea of people, inhaled copious amounts of petuli, body odor, and somehow found myself back to where I started dreaming exactly 1 year ago. Music and performances by Stevie Wonder, Kings of Leon, Jay Z, Mumford & Sons, The National, Phoenix, Norah Jones, and many many others inspired me with their passion, creativity and originality. The key to a good song or good performance is not only talent, but honesty. The root of all creation is truth and realization followed by love. I've always known the root of good music, but after being in Nashville for a just a year, my vision was muddled by external worries that a business perspective can create. 

On June 8th, I had a conversation with someone in the music business that I admire- Tom Douglas, a very successful and talented songwriter. I went into the "meeting" with an elevated heart rate, shortness of breath, aka mild anxiety knowing I had no answers, no confidence in myself as a writer. As we got to talking- I realized, the nature of being creative and the nature of being a writer is scary. It's a vulnerable place to be and I'm not the only one that feels that way. I may have left that conversation with more questions, but I gained a small hint of the voice I've been searching myself for. 

All this to say, I'm still searching. I'm still a little bit lost. But it's like wandering the grounds at Bonnaroo, whether I'm at "This" "That" or "The Other", the heat, the smell, the music, the heat... did I mention the heat?... it was all in search of a voice. Some voices were better than others, but in the end, everyone was out there because they love music. So that's why I'm out here in Nashville, I love music. 

More to come soon... All the love :) 


1 comment:

  1. Well I love you and miss you!!.

    Oh... and I love music too!